At first glance, the polished black headstone in an Iowa cemetery looks like a heartfelt tribute to a beloved patriarch.

Take a closer look at the capital letters, and a very different message appears.

When 59-year-old Steven Paul Owens passed away in September 2021, his children wanted to honor his sharp, unfiltered sense of humor. They chose an epitaph that appeared entirely traditional across its seven lines:
“Forever in our hearts / Until we meet again / Cherished memories / Known as: / Our son, brother, father, papa, uncle / Friend & / Cousin.”
Read vertically from top to bottom, the first letters spell out a blunt, profanity-laced kiss-off.

A Secret Joke That Rocked The Cemetery
The monument sits inside Warren-Powers Cemetery in rural Polk County, Iowa. It was installed on May 27, 2022.
Almost immediately, the intentional acrostic sparked backlash among local residents and cemetery managers.
The Camp Township Board of Trustees quickly moved to have the marker removed, arguing that profane language violates community decency standards.
“People have the right for decency, not just the one family,” a township representative said in a statement. Officials warned that allowing vulgar phrasing creates a slippery slope for cemetery oversight.

Love Language Or Public Indecency?
The Owens family stands firmly behind the tribute.
According to his daughter, Lindsay Owens Andrews, the phrase was her father’s signature term of endearment.
“If he didn’t like you, he didn’t speak to you,” Lindsay told local reporters. “If you got him to tell you to f*** off, it meant he liked you.”
His son, Zachary Owens, said the family never intended to cause public outrage. They simply wanted a memorial that genuinely captured who their dad was in life.
“No one’s forcing anyone to come out and look at it,” Zachary told KCCI-TV. “We did it because it was our father and we love him.”

What We Know
Steven Paul Owens died in September 2021 at the age of 59.
The family arranged the memorial epitaph as an acrostic spelling a profane phrase.
Township trustees instructed the memorial company not to install the stone prior to placement.
The manufacturer installed the marker regardless on May 27, 2022.
Township officials consulted legal counsel to seek the removal of the monument.

Why This Matters
This dispute strikes at a growing cultural battle over public decorum versus personal expression. Across the country, memorialization is shifting away from solemn traditions toward deeply personal, sometimes irreverent tributes. But when private family grief collides with shared communal spaces, communities are forced to decide where individual expression ends and public decency begins.
As township leaders weigh legal action, the Owens family remains resolute: their father earned the final word.